i am coming to the end

I’m coming to the end

 

I fill like I’m coming to the end.

I’m sitting righting this as my carers are hard asleep. They might as well be asleep.

I asked for a drink and they  didn’t get it.

 

This is getting to a point  and its emotionally draining.

They think they can get away with this but this is the 3d time now so…

I just want to get to demellza, then I will have both looking after me but I will no I can full onto demelza, at least they will hear my cries and respond.

As I right this next line they have just jolted awake but layed back to sleep.

Its no good jolting when sommone walks in. or going umm mmm imm in your sum what not sleep just to make me think you are awake. I no full well you have been asleep.

 

It sadnds me that this is what we have left… a broken plan/system.

If I had stayed in ward 12 I cold of got better.

Or if dr b had followed his plan then it would have worked out for me.

Its not nice that I have been put in this place of anger.

The only reason im am harf happy they are with me is that it means I can go to demellza.

 

 

They defo no what to do and when to do it so they don’t get caught.

 

I am honestly so upset at them now it is getting flipping stupid now.

And I would use worse but for the respect of the people I will keep my p and qs to a minimal.

I have had another night of no sleep but at about 3:45 jess {name change} said “I think you need to sleep. So do you have anything planed for today”

I ofc said no nothing planed and she came back with the oh I was just concerned,

No you wanted to sleep.

 

It must be such an easy job for them normally, sleep on the job.

 

Its just so sad about it all.

In the space of 10 mins they have asked about 20 times are you ok, don’t lie just say it

You are doing it to make sure you stay awake

I’ve been up since 10 last night and did not get any of this

I got the ode are you ok? But that is all I need at the end of the day.

I do not need to be asked 10000 times “are you ok” the latist are you ok is because I took a hearband off my wrist

 

 

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

 

Re: studies

I have been talking to molly _{name change} and she has said that they most curtonly wont have a problem with me doing the causera causes I want to do.

I                             t say everything we discussed but that is mainly because the full meeting is on Thursday and this is from a 5 minute checkin she had with my mum and I was in the room.

 

I think I need to start to do things as if people like {name change} Fredy, harly crla are not going to take time and do what they are hear to do then I will get beter myself.

However selfish that sounds, however much you think that I am shit stirring with my words. Do I care no

This is how I fill.

 

Thankyou for reading

 

“all lights turned off can be turned on, ill drive all night, ill stay on the line” song

 

Malachi tyler

Blogging since 2024

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